For godly grief produces a repentance that leads to salvation without regret, whereas worldly grief produces death. (2 Corinthians 7:10 ESV)
There is to be grief, sorrow, and mourning over sin. However, if the best I can muster is self-pity or mud-wallowing shame because I got caught, then my heart’s revealing a deeper issue. In my pride, that's the issue, I want to be known as someone who has it all together. That I’m really “all that.” That I can eventually ascend to the heights of greatness and there will be a truck-load of regret when I cannot attain that level of righteousness. The weight of this is crushing. No one can shoulder this load. Anyone who tries will die with unforgiven sin.
My repentance is to focus my attention once again on God's holiness—also that my sin is a contradiction to His holiness and who I am in Christ—the costliness of Christ's sacrifice, the power of His resurrection and the ongoing work of the Spirit that I am to be in synch with (see Galatians 5:25).
As John Owen put it: "On Christ’s glory I would fix all my thoughts and desires, and the more I see of the glory of Christ, the more the painted beauties of this world will wither in my eyes and I will be more and more crucified to this world. It will become to me like something dead and putrid, impossible for me to enjoy."
The things I once reveled in are becoming more and more "dead and putrid, impossible for me to enjoy." This is the genuine outcome of true repentance. This is what I am to aim for.